Having one of those days

Here are most of Courtney's meds she is no longer on Creon but Zen Pep and I am missing the Advair in this picture. As Eric and I were filling her pill holders I figured out on a month of 31 days my sweet baby take 558 or more depending on how many snacks she has. I am just having one of those type of days where I just want to scream and cry but I won't because I know there are others out there that go  through or have gone through more that I have with my baby... 
I would love to be able to go out to eat and not have to remember to take her pills, I would love for her too have 2 extra hours a day to play, But OH NO we can't do I hate it YES but I will make sure to do everything I can to keep her as healthy as I can. This is NORMAL for US and this is NORMAL for Courtney. She starts school a month from tomorrow. Am I scared? Hell yes I am scared for the fact that she will be there all day.  It was different when she was only going half days. Last winter was OK we managed to AVOID club med..  I am just having one of those love hate relationships today with CF!!!!!

Sorry for just rambling and not making any since at all.